I'm doing this post today instead of tomorrow because it doesn't really look like I'm going to have time to do it tomorrow. Nor does it really look like anything much will be changing before tomorrow.
My week has been largely uneventful. Not that we haven't been busy, it's just not anything spectacular. We went out and made sales calls, unfortunately not getting the predicted landslide of contracts that we were expecting this week. We finally borrowed a copy of Kung Fu Panda for Dearest to watch. We had dinner at our Jewish friends' house (and his wife made the first dish with salmon that I've ever been able to eat without wanting to gag). We babysat their adorable kids while they went to an awards dinner for his work - which did two things for me: 1) I'm not struggling as much with the desire to have children. Screaming, teething, sleepy babies will do that. 2) my house is clean. Well, the portion people who walk in will see is, anyway. It hasn't been in a few weeks though, so that's nice.
Our goal this week is to get a "pipeline" going. For those who may not know, in terms of business a pipeline just refers to a set of new incoming business. We're working on closing the deal with his former customers (much to the chagrin of his former boss, who called to issue a verbal cease and desist the other day...which we will not be complying with). Now the challenge is to find new people, people we've never met before, who think that what we've got at the price we're giving it away for is a good idea.
All in all, it's been an alright week. Our emotional nerve endings are frayed, between the old boss trying to pretend he has something to threaten us with (can't scare someone who has nothing left to lose) and the financial situation at the moment. We've been at each other's throats more than once. But as I work on getting myself into a routine that ensures I'll have read my bible, journaled a little, and had a cup of coffee and a shower before I even begin to deal with my ADD husband...I think we'll do better. Part of the reason we've fought the way we have recently is just that the situation has me emotionally drained and somewhat impatient and for the sake of his health he's gone off his stimulants...just as I'm getting on them. Go figure, right?
Fortunately, blessedly, we do have a little bit of help from people around us. My sister in law has volunteered to grab food for us when she goes to the food bank, which will help a lot with getting bills paid. Our upstairs neighbor has agreed to just take care of one of the utility bills while we take care of the other one, and our landlord/mentor is being really gracious with us - which is especially nice since a large majority of our monthly financial commitments lie with him...car payment, rent payment, etc.
I am going to look for a job again, something I'd stopped doing in hopes that my full concentration in our new business venture would accelerate our profitability. But, crops don't grow overnight even if you feed them all night long, so I'm going to see if I can snag something part time or temporary to make life a little more relaxing overall until 5&16 takes off more. Fortunately, the community center is a very short walk from our house and needs summer workers.
In all of this, one of the things that has helped me hang on the most is hope for the future. Though I don't focus as much on the more grandiose things as I used to, I do focus on "better." I look forward to being able to have dinner parties in our home, to affording real date nights, to having just that little bit of extra so we can go out on a whim. I look forward to the little things, and I trust that God will bring all good things to us, and that's getting me through.
This coming week there is much to do. I need to read my book, something I didn't do last week. I need to re-evaluate my goals, and I need to get my schedule and commitments straightened out. I'm looking forward to my book, this one is "It's Your Time" by Joel Osteen and from the introduction, it's going to be good.
So here's to this week, may yours be good. And unless something riles me up again (like the planned parenthood bit) I'll talk to you again next Monday.